Beginilah

Udara pagi terasa agak pengap, matahari sudah tak malu-malu lagi berpose di timur langit. Tak ada suara burung berkicau, tak ada tanda kehidupan selain napas seorang yang terkubur dalam tebalnya selimut. Sepi. Cih. Mungkin sudah saatnya untuk bangun dari buaian angan-angan yang tak menjanjikan. Selimut tiba-tiba tersibak, mengungkap sepasang mata merah yang sebenarnya masih ingin tertutup, begitu juga pemiliknya. Jam berapa ini? Ah siapa peduli? Waktu tak lagi menjadi hal yang penting sekarang, begitu pikirnya. Kenyataannya, waktu memang tidak pernah menjadi hal yang penting bagi dirinya. Satu hal yang pasti harus ia perbaiki.

Fooly Faithful

What’s the point of waiting for the embers which have been so long extinguished by the rain?

What’s the point of waiting at the building that has been ruined for so long?

What are you expecting?

'Though the rain would not fall on it

The coals would remain ashes

The fire would remain out

What are you expecting?

What do you want?

Warmth?

How can the embers warm you when they have turned into ashes themselves?

How?

How could you still waiting?

How could you still wanting?

Why won't you consider to find something else? something new?

Why won't you try to make a new flame? a better one?

Why won't you just let it go?

Is it that hard?

Was it that bad?

Were you hurt that much?

What are you expecting?

The house is no more than just a pile of bricks

There is no sign of life anymore

Only dust left

What do you want?

A protection? A shelter?

With the split walls, broken ground, collapsed roof, damaged bridge

Do you still believe it can give you a protection?

caps lock & volume notification

Hi, this time i'm gonna post something useful *finally, yayy!* I have an Acer 4750z. Some weeks ago i've found my laptop broke so i went to a repairing center and there i got my laptop totally re-installed *and i lost all my data T-T*. My laptop is indeed fixed, but i got a complain: the caps lock and volume notification is gone! so then i got back to the repairing center but they said it could have been from the original system and they couldn't fix it since they have re-installed it. They didn't think it's a serious matter but i did. I'm the user+ the owner anyway, so it did matter. I couldn't believe what they said so i was searching trough Google for weeks and then i bumped to some pages. They say you gotta install a program named Dell Quickset if you want the caps lock image appears again, i was so excited and download it without a second thought but then there came a problem; my laptop ain't Dell and it won't work! in other words, it's not compatible for my laptop. So i tried to search for different keywords, and there they came to my mind: Acer special function keys. I forgot how exactly i found this but finally i know that i gotta download a Launch Manager, so i did. I installed it, restarted the laptop, and here are the result:

my caps lock notification

my volume's level notification

So yeah! there are back! I'm very happy i got this one right! Anyway you can download the Launch Manager at acer center site. I hope this can help those who have the same trouble as me :)

no twitter day #10

Jadi hari ini hari ke 10 deactivate twitter. Sebenernya kadang masi pake acc twitter yang satunya si hehehe... rencananya di hari ke 20 atau lebih dikitlah, mau di aktifin lagi... semoga aja ga lupa, kalo lupa ilang deh tu akun

no twitter day #1

totally dying. idk what to do without twitter & whatsapp. been thinking to reactivate them.... but NO!!! gotta get used to it!!
anywy, today i bought a new watch. it's pink *yea i know yea*, but it's very cute :3 I've already had like 5 watches + *more or less* 10 pairs of watch's belts. So now i have like 6 watches, or more. I know it's crazy but i just couldn't help it... it's totally cutee >.<
It looks like this one, but mine is pink... * why the hell did i choose pink??* mungkin gue lagi suka aja sama warna pink :p

Bye twitter, by stalker

I've just decided to deactivate my twitter acc. I don't wanna get stressed. Twitter is addicting, for sure, addicting means bad. I get addicting to keep on stalking you. It's crazy. I wanna stop. Every time i go on twitter or whatsapp, I end up hurting myself by looking at your profile. My heart still aches when i see your timeline. It's hard to see you hooking up with another girl. Pathetic is me. I'll never move on when i keep on watching you. I want to move on. I want to fall in love again. I want to stop killing myself. It's better not to know anything about you, anymore.

Two months later: I'm still a stalker -___-

The Affair

Hi again! This is my second short story that i've written on my writing journal, and now i post it on my blog. yaaayyy! hope you guys enjoy it! WARNING: it contains a huge amount of cheesiness!

---

“Stop worrying about me. How I am living with. I’m someone who has nothing to do with you… someone who should never have anything to do with you.”

-A Love to Kill-

***

“Just one day, let’s catch some fun on this day!” was what he said to me this morning, and then we ended up in this coffee shop. I was sitting by the window with a cup of coffee in my hands. Richard was sitting in front of me. His eyes indicated that he was tired. But he wasn’t the only one who was tired. Both of us were tired. So tired.

It was almost 10 p.m. and we’d been sitting there for one hour. There was a silence between us, but it wasn’t awkward at all. Then suddenly he reached my hands and clutched them.

I examined his face. I saw deeply through his blue crystal clear eyes that could conquer the heart of any girl in this town. I saw that there was a lot of love for me, just as much as I had for him. But I could also see a hidden misery behind them.

The Nightmare!

Hello, I decided to post a short story. Actually i have made a lot of short stories, but i never finished them. I managed to finish this one because i have to post it on my writing class journal. So YES! this is my very first short story. There are a lot of grammar mistakes when i made it, but now i've corrected some of them. Maybe some of the mistakes are still there, but i hope it won't disturb the reading. Ow and i forgot to mention that, don't get me wrong! I do love cats! Feeling clueless? just read it! ^^ Enjoy it!

***

This morning I saw a black cat crossed in front of my house. He stopped and looked at me with his filthy face, pleading. Pshaw! I hated the face. I hate the eyes. I hate cats! Know what? All cats were hypocrites, pretending to be vulnerable so that people feel pity. Acted annoyingly sweet when they’re asking food, but silently left when the master no longer had any food. This cat was no exception. I sniffed in disgust as the black cat approached my feet and rubbed his head. I could feel my stomach twisting, ready to throw up, not my lunch, but my hatred. And I did. Before I realized, my feet has already kicked him, right at the abdomen. A lot surprised, the cat looked at me sharply and hissed. A strong, long hiss. His fur was all standing up straight. Something in his eyes made me wanna step back and run. Lucky me, or so I thought, the cat decided to take his leave first.

I ... You

Those forbidden words. mine. for you.
Forbidden words. that I'd like to cry out loud. but not in front of you.
I won't. tell. you. or them. why?
maybe because. I. am. not. brave. enough. Or maybe it's just because. my pride. doesn't allow me to do so.
Dunno.
The only thing I know is that. I. sickly. want. to. shout. those. words. to. you. but. I'll. never. be. able. to.
Call me dumb. Call me nuts. Call me loser. Call me everything you want. But. I'm. To. You. I. Still. . .

Gue gagal

Blog sayang, hari ini gue ngerasa gagal dewasa.
Hari ini, Sabtu, 3 Agustus 2013, gue sadar tentang satu hal.
Rencananya sore ini gue ada janji buka bareng temen-temen X4. Gue seneng banget karena hari itu pertama kalinya kita ketemu setelah 2than, apalagi ketemu si mantan. Adek sepupu gue juga ada buber hari itu. Adek gue baru banget msuk SMA kemaren & dia juga baru-baru banget dibeliin motor. Kenapa gue ngomongin adek gue? Ntar adalah sangkut pautnya.

maturity doesn't come with age, does it?

Everybody who knows me close or not, knows that i am nowhere near to maturity. It's not a problem actually. There are a lot of people who are far worse than me. The matter is, i choose this state. i choose to be childish. i am too comfy with this. i think i refuse to be mature. they say problems are gonna make you mature. believe me, i've been passing problems as much as a normal-20-year-old- girl can possibly trough. and yet, i still feel like i'm a child...
you know, i'm such a dreamer... but i am not a doer... i spend my whole holiday watching some movies or dramas or animes, and neglect all my works. sometimes i just feel like visiting other world... sometimes i'm dreaming of a world full of magic, like wonderland.. having a great adventure, becoming a hero... even sacrificing my life for.. my true love... i know it's just a daydreaming... i'm kind of avoiding the reality i have though the reality is not really bad... and i feel like it keeps me away from a larger society...
don't mind me. i might just dead drunk of coffee.

i'm stuck

Right at this moment i'm trying to finish my home assignments. The due date is tomorrow, it's 11:33, and actually, i haven't even started it, yet. u la la!
Gosh, it's so frustrating! i'm supposed to write my damn opinion of a literature right now, but i have NO IDEA AT ALL in my mind that makes me end up writing in this blog!!! How the heck do i write my opinion over something that i do not understand the content so well??
AAA!!! really really wanna get over it soon! it's more frustrating than philosophy that i took last semester!
i got enough nausea of feminism last semester, and yet i have to swim it deeper in this semester.. i feel like i could never get it...
I'm taking literary criticism this semester. it was an ease course at first, but then it turned out to be something horrible. the lecturers give us many many difficult homework that i could barely finish them on time!

I'm thinking about sleeping & let the miracle happen right now -___-

Behind the "Menu Hari Ini"

About a week ago i got an assignment from my lecturer to write down my interpretation (appreciation) of an installation art. There are lots of installation arts in my campus, and i just needed to pick up one. So i picked up the most 'simple' one entitled "Menu Hari Ini" by Iriantine Karnaya. Here's the picture:

The reason why i chose this installation is that because it looks simple, don't you think? It consists of 4 giant bowls (or plates?) and a smaller one in the middle. Each bowl's filled with replica of food. One consists of some kind of noodle, beef & mushroom, one with pasta, others are filled of macaronis, beans, mushrooms, or just by a sunny side egg. "What so simple! Maybe the interpretation of the purpose would be simple too!" Well, that was what i thought. But when we finally discussed it's meaning in the class, turned out that it's not as easy as what i thought -__-.